What do you guys think about this?

it's mothers day and its time to express, since i can say more than every card in any store, i'll write for myself on how i feel now and how i felt before. todays a day of recognition of my heart condition, everytime i asked for permission and it wasnt given. for every burden that was lifted and shifted from the shoulders of my mother and dropped on the lives of every other. its been all about you since day one, every battle that was fought it wasnt over til you won. you continued to shove and called it tuff love, saying i'll regret everything once your looking down from above. i gave you the gratification, telling the world i was at blame. let you win your competitions and play your demented game. bossing me around like me and a puppy are the same. if this repetition of strife is the definition of life i'd rather not live being stabbed by a knife, but props to you to have a title of even being called a wife. im not mad and im not putting you down, im not even saying i dislike having you around. it's not your fault for the way i live, its not in my nature to say i forgive. im not asking for an explanation to your fascination of dictation and domination, and i believe your not expecting adoration or fake conversation because of an obligation, to make you smile. while. deep inside are feelings to be expressed that are worthwhile. you have the support of every single person in your life but me. you have everyone glad to be on their knees to make you happy so whether i kissed your *** to beg and plea, to fake that i love you, it wouldnt make a difference dont you agree? my gift to you on mothers day is honesty. thank you for the few things you've contributed with to make things the least bit better. and thank you for taking the time to read this letter. thank you for letting me practice on how to stand my own ground, and to not expect to always have people around, and to make sure i was used to being talked down. what you wanted is what you got, and when i was caught, you put me on the spot and made sure i never forgot. you had your brothers and sisters help you raise your child, and smiled. as you saw the misery you put everyone through, loved to make me wrong when i was right and you know its true. put me at fault out of the blue. i wonder if you ever wondered if it wasnt everyone else, maybe it was you? still, things dont change, how you are is how you'll stay. but you've always gotten your way, so i thinks thats enough for you to enjoy your mothers day.